Not Alone

The pains I don't know how to ease. 

The heartbreaks I can't fix.

The unfair situations I have no power over. 

The struggles I have no solution for. 

The worries that I only have words to attempt to ease.

The tears I can only wipe and hug away. 

The problems I can't solve. 

The trauma I can't take away.

The realities I can't fathom, let alone make less harsh. 

God is aware of them. 

Where I am powerless, He is still powerful. 

When I can only hug, He can bring peace to hearts.

When all I can do is offer a temporary retreat form the harshness of the real world, He is hard at work in the trenches. 

Where I have no solutions, no answers, He has a master plan. 

When words fail me, He doesn't need me to speak them aloud.

Most of all, He is aware. He is on it. He is working. 

In all the sickness, all the hurt, all the world .... He is there. And He will prevail. 

When the days are long and the worries are mighty .... He is mightier.

He's holding all the sweet babies in His hand. He's with them, too, in a greater way than I can ever be  That's what I'll be reminding myself  as I search for sleep tonight.

They are not alone. God's aware. He's on it. He's got them. 

Waiting To Be Overwhelmed

My brother-in-law preached a wonderful sermon on Sunday .... You can listen to it here. It got me thinking a lot, and I'd like to share one of those thoughts with you.

The background: 

 In 2 Chronical 14:11 King Asa was up against an Ethiopian army with 1 million men and 300 chariots. He was out numbered 2:1. Any onlooker would have assumed he was facing a crushing defeat. Yet, he knew better. 

Vs  11 reads "And Asa cried out to the LORD his God, and said, "LORD, it is nothing for You to help, whether with many or with those who have no power; help us, O LORD our God, for we rest on You, and in Your name we go against this multitude. O LORD, You are our God; do not let man prevail against You!"

Long story short? Against all obvious earthly odds, Asa, and God, won. By a landslide. 

Fast forward a short time, and in 1 Chronicles 16 we find Asa facing a much smaller political opponent - a much more manageable foe. And this time? This time, instead of calling on God,  Asa makes a treaty with another king. They work together, they handle the issue, and all is well. 

......except in vs.7 we read "Because you have relied on the king of Syria, and have not relied on the LORD your God, therefore the army of the king of Syria has escaped from your hand."

Basically, Asa had called on God when he was desperate. When he had no other options. When he knew there was no earthly force to save him. 

But when he wasn't overwhelmed? When he was still inside his comfort zone and had earthly options? He completely forgot to call upon the same God who had saved him before. 

Josh made some really good points about this in his sermon. Seriously, listen to it! 

But here's what I kept thinking: Oh man. We do that. *I* do that. Sometimes in this life I get so busy "handling it" that I forget to stop and ask God for help. Sometimes I search out all the earthly options before I remeber I have much more powerful heavenly options. Sometimes I get caught up in me, running in auto pilot, treading water, pushing through that I forget there is a much, MUCH better way. 

I don't have to be like King Asa. 

I don't have to wait until I am in an incredibly overwhelming, scary, all-earthly-options-exhausted situation to ask God for help. On the contrary, I should be calling on Him all the time. 

Satan lays traps. And one I fall into sometimes is forgetting how much God cares about the "little" daily stuff too. 

So, here are some specific prayers I'm praying to help myself combat this:

"Please help me have patience with _______ today". (Because let's face it, I need all the patience help I can get).

"Please help me figure out what (student) needs from me today to help them be at peace/feel success." (Guys, I have a great support team at school who is always helping me- but I could use Gods help, too).

"Please help me have the energy to do what I need to do today and be the Christian, mom, and teacher I need to be." (Lack of sleep and energy are some of my biggest, most consistent battles. I used to think it was silly to pray for sleep and energy. Now I know it's not.)

I know your specific prayers, your daily needs, your small issues that you "could push through and handle yourself" look a bit different from mine .... But the fact that God cares about them? That's the same. 

We don't have to wait til the little things compound into giant issues to ask for help. God wants us to acknowledge our need for Him all the time so he can be with us all the time. 

Lean into Him. He wants to be there for you. 

A Little Bit of Nothing

Tonight I came home, and made the choice to do nothing. 

As a working parent, there are a million things I need to do each evening to have us prepped for the next day and the rest of the week. And most of the time "a million"  doesn't even seem like an exaggeration. 

But today, today I was tired. Like completely drained, can't even focus to see what needs done next in my to do list, tired. So I said to myself "when I get home, I am going to do absolutely nothing". 

And so, I did. 

Except first, I picked up my day-care kiddo.

Then we went to the grocery store. 

Which meant I had to carry in bags and put away the groceries.

And then I cleaned out both girls backpacks.

Since the outside animals needed fed, the girls and I went to tackle that. 

Some weeds (somehow, in September?) needed pulled, so I worked on those while the girls played. 

Apparently some people in my house appreciate clothes to wear, so I threw in a quick load of laundry. 

And dinner - even an easy one - needed fixed. 

The girls clothes needed laid out for tomorrow and lunches needed prepped. 

I replied to two school emails and a friend's message that needed answered. 

The fort the girls built will need taken down before bed....

But I really did leave things undone.

When I fed the animals I noticed the goat pens need raked, but I decided that can wait til Saturday. 

Those clothes (now in the dryer) already know  aren't getting folded tonight. 

The dishes are only done because my husband is awesome.

And instead of sweeping the floors that really need done (because I actually decided Id do nothing last night, too) ...  I took a hot bath. 

I say all of that, to tell you this: if your "do nothing" looks anything at all like my "do nothing" - and chances are, it does - then it is okay to let yourself "do nothing" a little more often. 

Once in a while, make the choice to only do the "have to's" and leave the "should do's" for another night. Once in a while, give yourself a break (and even a pat on the back). Once in a while, do a little bit of nothing so that you're up to going back to doing all the things another day. ❤️

Heart Strings

You. Guys.

I know a kiddo whose dad passed away recently. He crawled under my desk today to hide for a minute because he needed a quiet space. 

I know a kiddo whose home is in a bit of turmoil. He was extra loud today and needed lots of attention and movement.

I know another kiddo who is currently losing her grandpa, who has very much helped raise her. She needed extra encouragement and smiles today to keep plugging through. 

I know a kiddo who couldn't tell me what was wrong today - but he wasn't himself. He needed space, and breaks, in order to cope. 

These kids ... They are going through more than many adults have been through. 

They are struggling with things that adults absolutely fall apart trying to handle. 

.....and they show up to school every day.

They sit in their desks, they listen to my read aloud, they do work and math and projects and try to make good book choices to read independently and they walk quietly in the hall and keep their hands to themselves at recess  ...

...and they are just sweet little babies (who are old enough to be real mad that I called them that). 

We are striving to be a people that is *so good* at giving adults grace. We strive to meet each other where we are at. 

But these babies? These babies are in those same, really hard, sometimes terrible feeling, places. Most of the time, they didn't get there of their own choosing or their own actions. Much of the time they don't understand why they are there and they may not be able to see the whole picture of their own world. 

So, they show up to school.....Where I give them work to do and ask them to sit calmy in the chair and to please not talk over me. 

...... Yeah, Right.

They don't always know how to express what they are going through and worrying about. They don't always ask for help in productive ways. They haven't always figured out that positive attention is even better than negative attention. They sometimes have stories I cannot fathom that they aren't sure how to tell. 

Today was a good reminder that these babies need me to give them grace. They need me to meet them where they are at - even if that's under the teachers desk. They need me love them through their hardship and remain a consistent, patient, known factor, in their sometimes tumoltuous worlds. 

They need me to show them the importance of doing their work and behaving respectfully by showing them respect and helping provide them with coping strategies and patience. They need me to understand that some days are just hard - even for the best of us. And they need me to let them know it's okay to have hard days .... And help them figure out how to handle them productively. 

I've always known this teaching gig wasn't for the faint of heart. Once I thought that was because of the work load ... I'm learning it's a little bit of that, and a lot more because of the heart, itself. 

Winding Path

When the winding path is bumpy,

And if the potholes pull you in,

When the obstacles beset you,

Or the light is growing dim....

Then stop and take a moment, 

Let your travel slow it's pace,

And spend some time reflecting,

On why you're even in the race.

When you don't know where you're going,

Not quite sure where the path leads,

When you can't fortell the outcome,

Or know how the ending reads...

Then stop and take a breather,

And ponder this thought true,

While the journeys yours for taking,

It isn't all just up to you.

You don't have to light your own way,

You don't have to know it all,

You don't have to stumble blindly,

You don't have to risk the fall. 

So stop and say a prayer of thanks,

That God already knows,

The utterance of your heart itself,

And no matter what life throws...

You can safely keep on walking,

You can muddle through the mess,

If you'll lean on Him as you trudge on,

He will take care of the rest 

Oh, He'll guide you through the pitfalls,

Hold you up through every woe,

And though it won't be completely easy,

He'll help you know the way to go. 

And the journey goes much quicker,

With His comforting company,

When the path is lit with faith and hope,

You'll have everything you need. 

Permission

Sometimes as ... Well ... Humans ... We have to be reminded that it's okay for us to feel. So here's your midweek reminder: 

You can be incrediy blessed and incredibly overwhelmed at the same time. 

You can be strong enough to handle it and simultaneously be just about ready to break. 

You can want to do more with all of your heart, and be too exhausted to figure out how. 

You can be trying your best and still wish you could do better. 

You can be so thankful for everything and also really need a break all in the same moment. 

It's okay to feel things that don't quite match up. It's okay to feel things you don't love feeling.

Pause. Pray. But don't give up. Wallowing doesn't make it better - a reset does. 

So, give yourself grace. Ask for help. Take a break. And then get up and keep going.

You may feel downtrodden, but God's got your back, and you've got this. 💪